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Gay and alone

977 11 months ago
I am a gay man in my late 50s and have never been in a relationship. I am so lonely, and the painful emptiness I feel is becoming absolutely unbearable. In my early 20s, I hooked up off and on, but it never developed into anything. I have a few lesbian friends but no male friends. When hookup apps were introduced, I used them infrequently. Now I go totally unnoticed or am quickly ghosted once I reveal my age.
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Being Gay and Lonely

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Why You Are Gay and Alone

As November comes to an end, the leaves are done changing and the chilly air is here to stay. Staying in and cuddling becomes more enticing, and cuffing season begins in full force. The undergrads of Duke scramble to secure a secure relationship before the holidays begin. In this time, I sit alone in my room as a young, single gay man and wonder what I did wrong.
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Why You Are Gay and Alone

I would have started writing this piece earlier, but the tendonitis in my right foot sent me to the doctor scrambling for relief. My body, that instrument that, once upon a time, introduced itself before I did, is falling apart. Happens to anyone whose name is not Cher. If you are gay, single, and childless, as I am, the future is as unpredictable today as the present was a couple of decades ago. Most something gay men I know are married, and a huge percentage have children.
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T he day after cautiously navigating the remains of churches and Christian graveyards burnt and defaced with graffiti and pockmarked by the bombs and bullets of Al Qaeda and ISIS, Ahmed Nader — a pseudonym used for his protection — sits across from me. He is visibly nervous throughout our interview, even though we are in a secret location that took weeks for him to agree upon. Nader, in his mid-thirties, constantly asks for reassurance that no one can overhear our conversation.
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